There were three morticians talking about their greatest feats. The first one says, "I had this soldier who stepped on a landmine. It took me three days to get him ready for an open casket funeral!"The second mortician says, "Oh yeah?

I had this construction worker who fell 15 stories, then he got run over by a steam roller, but I had him ready fo an open casket funeral in two days!"The third mortician sulks in the corner, "Wow, you two have me beat.

I had this lady parachutist who landed on the Empire State Building. It took me four days just to get the smile off her face!"

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