The old man had been drinking in the pub all day. Closing time came so he decided to take the risk and drive home. On the way he was pulled over by the police.

"Can you blow in the bag for me sir?" the cop asked the old man.

"No way, I'm asthmatic, I can't breathe properly!" replied the old man.

"Okay then, we will take a blood test then." said the cop.
"No, you can't do that," the old man yelled, "I'm a haemophiliac!

Once I start bleeding it doesn't stop.
"Well," answered the cop, "You will just have to walk a straight line for me then!"

"Nahhh, I can't do that either!" replied the old man.
"I suppose your going to tell me that you crippled as well!" said the cop.

"Nahh," replied the old man, "I'm just too fucking pissed!"

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