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A Jamaican is at the Gates of Heaven.

St Peter: I have to ask you 3 questions before I can let you in.

Jamaican: No problem

St Peter: Which day of the week begin with the letter "T"?

Jamaican: Today and tomorrow

St. Peter: Well, that wasn't really the answer I was looking for but I'll give you the second question. How many seconds are there in a year?

Jamaican: 12

St. Peter: How did you arrive at 12?

Jamaican: 2nd of January, 2nd of Feb, 2nd of March, 2nd of by now St. Peter is getting exasperated with this foo-fool Jamaican.

St. Peter: Final question now. What is the name of our Lord and Saviour?

Jamaican: Andy

St. Peter: Good God man, don't you read your Bible?

Jamaican: Yes, but every time mi guh a church dem sing: Andy walks with me, Andy talks with me, Andy tells me that I am his own...

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