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"My god! What happened to you?" the bartender asked Paddy as he walked in on one crutch with one arm in a cast.

"I got into an argument with Mick!" replied Paddy.

"Mick? He's just a wee fellow," the barman said, surprised, "He must have had something in his hand!"

"Aye...that he did!" replied Paddy, "A shovel it was!"

"Dear lord.....didn't you have anything in your hand Paddy?" said the barman.

"Aye, that I did, Mick's wife's tits!" Paddy said, "And a beautiful pair they were as well, but not much use in a fight!"

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