One day a woman went in hospital to have a baby and decided there and then that she would also have cosmetic surgery to her vagina to make it look more youthful, seeing as her gammon was dangling a bit low and looked a bit like a ripped out fireplace.
She decided that she needed a little tuck here and a nip there so it would stop looking like a badly packed kebab.
After having her baby, she was immediately taken into the operating room for her horses collar to be worked on.
After coming out of the anaesthetic she saw three roses in a vase at the base of her bed.
"Who sent me the roses?" the woman asked the nurse.
"Well," replied the nurse, "The first rose is from the surgeon, just to say thanks for making the operation go so well."
"Ohhh, that's nice," said the woman, "Who sent the other two then?"
"Well," replied the nurse, "The second rose is from your husband, seeing as you have been so brave."
"Ohhhhh, he's so sweet."said the woman, "But who sent the third rose?"
"Well," replied the nurse, "Thats from Eric in the burns unit. He just wanted to say thanks for the ears!"