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The pissed up tramp was stumbling down the street with one foot on the kerb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said, "I have to take you in sir, your obviously drunk!"

The tramp replied, "Officer, ar ya absolutely shure I'm drunk, burpppp!"

"Yeah buddy," replied the cop, "I'm sure!"

"That's a relief," said the tramp, "I thought I was a cripple!"

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