One day a policeman was driving down the road when he saw a car in front of him driving erratically. He put his siren and lights on and pulled the car over to the side of the road.
The policeman walked over to the driver and said, "Excuse me sir, have you been drinking?"
"Oh yes!" replied the man proudly, "It's Friday night and me and my friends, burp, went straight to the pub from work, burp, and had about seven beers, then we went to the pub next door for happy hour and I had four cocktails then after that I went to my friend's house, burp, and had a half bottle of whiskey, burp!"
"Sir," said the policeman sternly, "can you please step out of the vehicle, and breathe into this breathalyser tube for me!"
"Why?" asked the drunk, "Don't you, burp, believe me?"