There was a farmer and his son who ran the ranch by themselves. One day when the son was in the field, a terrible accident happened, and the son lost an eye. The old farmer was too poor to buy his son a glass eye, so he made one out of finely polished oak wood and hand painted it.
It was many years before the son was exposed to the public, and the local farmers were holding a square dance for their sons and daughters. That night the boy got all dressed up and went to the dance, where he spent most of the night bored, sitting in the corner all by himself.
Suddenly he spotted a girl in the other corner who had a harelip. He thought to himself, "Now that's a girl who would understand me!", so he walked over to the girl.
"Would you like to dance?", he said.
The girl replied, "Would I!"
The boy shouted, "I didn't call you cunt face did I?"