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60th Birthday Jokes
– 5 total
60th Birthday Jokes
– 5 total
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60th birthday thrills: more pills, more chills, and more bills.
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At 60 years old, your birthday suit requires regular ironing.
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Turning 60 means:
Your favorite classic rock is now elevator music.
You wonder why the TV remote isnt working, then realize its a cordless phone.
At the gym, you mostly do squats because of how they help you in the bathroom.
When classic movies come on, your comments are: Shes dead. Hes dead. Theyre all dead.
Your childhood toys sell for a fortune on eBay.
The quantity of gold in your mouth would make a decent retirement plan.
You can never totally, completely trust a fart.
Not wearing a bra tugs the wrinkles right out of your face.
Your parties never even wake up the dog, let alone the neighbors.
Sucking in your gut can blow the hair right off the top of your head.
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Turning 60 means:
Fortune tellers read your face instead of your palm.
Your favorite station on cable is the Weather Channel.
You shop at Target and Walmart for the great clothes.
People call you spry and youre not offended.
The old spark takes a little more blowing to get going.
You know your way around but you dont want to go anywhere.
Your wife suggests you pull in your stomach and you get a hernia doing it.
You're not only interested in automobile airbags, you've become one.
The candles on your cake set off the sprinkler system.
You still miss your high school car, but you cant remember your classmates.
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At twenty we worry about what others think of us.
At forty we don't care about what others think of us.
At sixty we discover they haven't been thinking about us at all.
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