A 72 year old millionaire meets a 20 year old super model one day and after a whirlwind romance they get married. A few weeks later the millionaire see's his friend.
"Joe," his friend asked, "There is something I have been dying to know."
"What's that?" replied the millionaire.
"Well, how did you manage to persuade that beautiful young girl to marry you?"
"Oh that's easy," replied the millionaire, "I told her I was 95 years old!"
I get up each morning and dust off my wits,
then pick up the paper and read the "o-bits".
If my name isn't there, then I know I'm not dead.
I eat a good breakfast and go back to bed.