Auto Jokes

 – 255 total
Drivers start your engines! It’s time to get a humorous reality check. Guess what is just an anti-theft device to protect vehicles in 2014 and beyond. And that is ladies and gentleman, the 5-speed manual gear vehicle because no one knows how to drive a stick or manufacturers are not making manual geared vehicles.

Here we’ve added the most popular and viral funny auto jokes from all over the Internet. We have taken the best ones we could find, including the ones you guys have sent to us, and added them here.

We are always adding new content to this section so be sure to check back often. While you’re browsing our collection of jokes, be sure to rate your favorites and share with your friends and kappit!
I have a flat tire. I should've brought
I have a flat tire. I should've brought

Memes,  Vegetable Puns,  Flat Tire Jokes,  
    
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got pulled over for distracted driving. i was eating ice cream cake on a paper plate. what was i supposed to do> let it melt? you sick ?
got pulled over for distracted driving. i was eating ice cream cake on a paper plate. what was i supposed to do> let it melt? you sick ?

Memes,  Funny Driving Quotes,  Healthy Eating Jokes,  
    
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With the rise of self driving vehicles, it's only a matter of time until there's a country song where the guy's truck leaves him
With the rise of self driving vehicles, it's only a matter of time until there's a country song where the guy's truck leaves him

Memes,  Country Music Jokes,  Truck Humor,  
    
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Nobody;

Chrysler 300 owners acting like they drive a Bentley:
Nobody;

Chrysler 300 owners acting like they drive a Bentley:


Memes,  Winnie The Pooh Jokes,  Funny Car Jokes,  
    
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Tesla cars can now diagnose themselves and pre-order parts if needed
Tesla cars can now diagnose themselves and pre-order parts if needed

Memes,  Technology Jokes,  
    
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Lmfao girls who drive like this go about 20 miles over, does abrupt stops, and whips it when they turn but never gets pulled over
Lmfao girls who drive like this go about 20 miles over, does abrupt stops, and whips it when they turn but never gets pulled over

Memes,  Driving Jokes One Liners,  
    
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The dmv be like you forgot to bring the declaration fo independence
The dmv be like you forgot to bring the declaration fo independence

Memes,  Be Like,  Annoying Jokes,  
    
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i hate y'all slow turning  drivers. swang that
i hate y'all slow turning drivers. swang that

Memes,  Driver Jokes,  Driving Jokes One Liners,  
    
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Having a car is cool until u have to get an oil change.. or an inspection...or a registration sticker... or new tires... or pay for gas
Having a car is cool until u have to get an oil change.. or an inspection...or a registration sticker... or new tires... or pay for gas

Memes,  Old Car Jokes,  
    
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Feeling cure, might pull you over for having tint like me later. idk
Feeling cure, might pull you over for having tint like me later. idk

Memes,  Funny Cop Sayings,  
    
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Car salesman: *Slaps roof of minivan*

This bad boy can fit so much friggin crumbs in it
Car salesman: *Slaps roof of minivan*

This bad boy can fit so much friggin crumbs in it


Memes,  Car Salesman Jokes,  
    
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Uber: "I/m in a blue Honda Civic."

Me: "Ok"

Me to me: "Ok, we know what blue is"
Uber: "I/m in a blue Honda Civic."

Me: "Ok"

Me to me: "Ok, we know what blue is"


Memes,  Uber Jokes,  Honda Jokes,  
    
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When you realize that the only reason you get bad gas mileage is because you keep flooring it all the time

I'm the last person I wold have suspected, but it was me all the time!
When you realize that the only reason you get bad gas mileage is because you keep flooring it all the time

I'm the last person I wold have suspected, but it was me all the time!


Memes,  Funny Car Quotes,  Funny Driving Quotes,  
    
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If BMW's were a person
If BMW's were a person

Memes,  Bmw Jokes,  
    
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The worst transmission shift ever.

Imagine thinking you're adjusting the volume and the next minute you're reversing on the interstate
The worst transmission shift ever.

Imagine thinking you're adjusting the volume and the next minute you're reversing on the interstate


Memes,  Car Jokes,  
    
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