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Best Drinking Jokes
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Best Drinking Jokes
– 158 total
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I only buy things at bars because I don't know what to do with my hands but then I get anxious I'm holding it for too long and drink it all and have to buy another cause I don't know what to do with my hands again
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Hangover early 20s: slam a blue Gatorade, 2 ibuprofen, g2g by noon
Hangover late 20s: Loss of day to day motor skills, depression, crazy thoughts, dehydrated, headache, regret, mesothelioma etc
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Me : Are you drunk?
Friend: "I haven't been even drujklnking"
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When your friend drank so much you though they died
U boys got an Advil
Bro we thought you died
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When you drink a disturbing amount and wake up without a hangover
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It's Austin 3:16 day today
Don't forget to drink a beer in honor of Stone Cold
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When u went too hard at the pregame and get out of the Uber and can't remember where you are
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when you remember you don't have to be back at work until tuesday
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i'm not an alcolic
i've just got a lot of reasons to celebrate
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When your friend is already blacked out but you buy em another drink
If he dies. He dies.
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Me: I'm not gna drink for a while
*gets a text message
"wyd tonight"
Me:
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- what's your favorite summer activity?
me:
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when someone asks why i'm drunk on weekday
i'm an adult.
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Gandalf:
When your high level friend joins the game you've been struggling with
When your boy who died at the pre game shows up at the club
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When your BFF keeps making you drinks and each ones stronger than the last...
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