A fellow walks into a restaurant, orders a drink and asks the waiter if he'd like to hear a good BYU joke. "Listen, buddy," the waiter growled. "See those two big guys on your left? They were both linemen on the BYU Cougar football team. And that huge fellow on your right was a world-class wrestler at the Y. That guy in the corner was the Y.'s all-time champion weightlifter. And I lettered in three sports at the Y. Now, are you absolutely positive you want to go ahead and tell your joke here?"
"Nah, guess not," the man replied. "I wouldn't want to have to explain it five times.'
As two BYU grads walked through the countryside, they noticed some tracks. The first asked, "Deer tracks?'' The second replied, "No, bear tracks.'' However, the conversation ended abruptly when a train hit them.