Funny Adult Quotes

 – 45 total
Spilling a full drink you paid for is the adult equivalent of letting go of a balloon.
Spilling a full drink you paid for is the adult equivalent of letting go of a balloon.

Memes,  Drink Jokes,  Funny Balloon Jokes,  
    
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When someone uses hip lingo such as squad, lit, fam or on fleek when speaking to me Haha well shamalamadingdong right back at ya ;)~
When someone uses hip lingo such as squad, lit, fam or on fleek when speaking to me

Haha well shamalamadingdong right back at ya ;)~

Memes,  Cool Funny Sayings,  Slang Jokes,  
    
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The UPS is truck is the adult equivalent to an ice cream truck
The UPS is truck is the adult equivalent to an ice cream truck

Funny Jokes,  Ups Jokes,  Ice Cream Joke,  
    
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nudes, send me your credit card number
nudes, send me your credit card number

Funny Quotes,  Credit Jokes,  
    
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Engineering "If you're not tired, you're not doing it right."
Engineering

"If you're not tired, you're not doing it right."

Engineering Sms Jokes,  Funny Engineering Slogans,  Quote Of The Day Work,  
    
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i'm not rude, i just speak what everyone else hasn't the balls to say.
i'm not rude, i just speak what everyone else hasn't the balls to say.

Freedom Of Speech Jokes,  Quote For The Day Funny,  
    
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this was a terrible day. first, my ex got hit by a bus. then, i lost my job as a bus driver.
this was a terrible day.

first, my ex got hit by a bus.

then, i lost my job as a bus driver.

Funny Ecards,  Bus Driver Jokes,  Funny Ex Boyfriend Quotes,  
    
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Adulthood "If you're not tired you're not doing it right."
Adulthood

"If you're not tired you're not doing it right."

Funny Quotes,  Adult Humor,  Tired Jokes,  
    
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Friday the 13th Watch Twilight and listen to Justin Bieber all day, if you're already in hell nothing worse can happen
Friday the 13th

Watch Twilight and listen to Justin Bieber all day, if you're already in hell nothing worse can happen

Memes,  Friday The 13th Memes,  Paranoid Parrot (theme),  
    
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When someone asks you why you unfollowed them. Because I'm grown
When someone asks you why you unfollowed them.

Because I'm grown

Memes,  Instagram Humor,  
    
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[jack niclson] once was with me at a benefit and learned over and said "even oysters have enemies." in a very intense voice. i responded with "increase your dosage."
[jack niclson] once was with me at a benefit and learned over and said "even oysters have enemies." in a very intense voice.

i responded with "increase your dosage."

Funny Quotes,  Robin Williams Joke,  Sea Life Jokes,  
    
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"i keep telling people: don't make me the poster boy for aa because i don't know a lot about sobriety, but i do know a lot about drinking."
"i keep telling people: don't make me the poster boy for aa because i don't know a lot about sobriety, but i do know a lot about drinking."

Funny Quotes,  Billy Joel Jokes,  Drinking Jokes One Liners,  
    
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when you sw up to the booty call after 2 am and her kids still up !
when you sw up to the booty call after 2 am

and her kids still up !

Memes,  Booty Call Jokes,  Kermit Meme,  
    
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pessimist: the gl is half empty optimist: the gl is half full me: yay! there is room for !
pessimist: the gl is half empty

optimist: the gl is half full

me: yay! there is room for !

Funny Quotes,  Funny Crazy Thoughts,  Cool Funny Sayings,  
    
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it's not hard for me to be an obnoxious
it's not hard for me to be an obnoxious

Meme,  Scott Disick Funny Quotes,  
    
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