Funny Confucius Sayings

 – 37 total
Confucius was a chinese philosopher who focused heavily on morality, justice and relationships. His beliefs were based on common chinese traditions. The funny confucius sayings on this page start off sounding like something that would be wise for us to take heed to but ends up being the total opposite. Sayings like, "Build man fire: warm for day. Set man on fire: warm for the rest of his life." and "Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse" are just a couple of examples of the nonsensical sayings that you will find here.

While you are here please take some time to rate your favorite sayings by giving it a thumb up or a thumb down and you can also share them via your social media channels. We consistently add new content so be sure to revisit again soon.
A clear conscience,

Is usually a sign of bad memory
A clear conscience,

Is usually a sign of bad memory


Wise Confucius,  Confucius Jokes,  
    
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Minnesota Vikings

Will go to Superbowl
Minnesota Vikings

Will go to Superbowl


Minnesota Vikings Jokes,  Wise Confucius,  
    
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a dog that barks

is not cooked enough
a dog that barks

is not cooked enough


Memes,  Dog Jokes Funny,  
    
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good for boy to meet girl in park

better for boy to park meat in girl
good for boy to meet girl in park

better for boy to park meat in girl


Memes,  Funny Love Advice,  
    
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confucius say

man w go through airport turnstile backwards definitely going to bangkok
confucius say

man w go through airport turnstile backwards definitely going to bangkok


Memes,  Bangkok Jokes,  Airport Jokes,  
    
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man w wants pretty nurse

must be patient
man w wants pretty nurse

must be patient


Memes,  Confucius Say Jokes,  
    
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pick pocket es watches

peeping tom watches es
pick pocket es watches

peeping tom watches es


Memes,  Tom Jokes,  Watch Jokes,  
    
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Why

Do I look like Ben
Why

Do I look like Ben


Memes,  Ben Jokes,  Asian Guy Meme,  
    
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Man with silver tongue

Has expensive tastes
Man with silver tongue

Has expensive tastes


Memes,  Silver Jokes,  
    
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It's better to have a crack in your phone

Than a phone in your crack
It's better to have a crack in your phone

Than a phone in your crack


Wise Confucius,  Phone Humor,  Cell Phone Jokes,  
    
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cofucius says

virginity like bubble, one  all gone.
cofucius says

virginity like bubble, one all gone.


Funny Jokes,  Confucius Say Jokes,  
    
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If you cannot convince them...

Confuse them.
If you cannot convince them...

Confuse them.


Wise Confucius,  Confused Jokes,  Confucius Jokes  
    
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Forgiveness is divine

But never pay full price for late pizza
Forgiveness is divine

But never pay full price for late pizza


Meme,  Wise Confucius,  
    
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He who eats too many prunes, sits on toilet many moons.

Confucius Jokes,  Confucius Says Jokes,  
    
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