Funny Dad Sayings

 – 40 total
Wife: I want a divorce

Me: Is it because I switched our baby our for a better one at the hospital before we left

Wife: What

Me: What
Wife: I want a divorce

Me: Is it because I switched our baby our for a better one at the hospital before we left

Wife: What

Me: What


Memes,  New Baby Jokes,  Divorce Memes,  
    
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Son: Daddy, what's your favorite kind of bird
Son: Daddy, what's your favorite kind of bird

Memes,  Bird Puns,  
    
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"getc  in the use... got them white folk thinking you a lil tt out here shaking yo ...gimmie yo pne
"getc in the use... got them white folk thinking you a lil tt out here shaking yo ...gimmie yo pne

Memes,  Barack Obama Jokes,  Funny Parenting Quotes,  
    
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*dad buying drugs*

dealer: you want some pot?

dad: nah, but i'll take a frying pan tugh hehehe

dealer: *sots him*
*dad buying drugs*

dealer: you want some pot?

dad: nah, but i'll take a frying pan tugh hehehe

dealer: *sots him*


Memes,  Corny Humor,  
    
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The "you're not my real dad" starter pack
The "you're not my real dad" starter pack

Memes,  Jokes About Kids,  Starter Pack Memes,  
    
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Dad: This is so amazing. I haven't seen u since the day u were born.

Son: I'm all grown up now. Just learned how to vape on a hover board. 

Dad: We should definitely get that D.N.A. test ASAP.
Dad: This is so amazing. I haven't seen u since the day u were born.

Son: I'm all grown up now. Just learned how to vape on a hover board.

Dad: We should definitely get that D.N.A. test ASAP.


Memes,  Deadbeat Dad Memes,  Father Son Jokes,  
    
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"Daddy doesn't know any magic tricks. Daddy knows accounting tricks."
"Daddy doesn't know any magic tricks. Daddy knows accounting tricks."

Funny Accounting Sayings,  Magic Jokes,  
    
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Dad: "Yall better clean that mess up before your mom get home"
Dad: "Yall better clean that mess up before your mom get home"

Memes,  Hotline Bling Meme,  Drake Memes,  
    
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I don't always give advice to my trophy wife's child

But when I do, he really hates it

You're not my real dad, old man
I don't always give advice to my trophy wife's child

But when I do, he really hates it

You're not my real dad, old man


Memes,  Most Interesting Man In The World Meme (theme),  Pajama Kid Meme,  
    
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I love my dad. He used to be a professional wrestler in Mexico. And it was cool growing up with him because when he hit us, he didn't really hit us.
I love my dad. He used to be a professional wrestler in Mexico. And it was cool growing up with him because when he hit us, he didn't really hit us.

Funny Jokes,  Great Mexican Jokes,  Stand Up Comedy Jokes,  
    
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w your father looked

when he bagged your mother
w your father looked

when he bagged your mother


Memes,  Fatherhood Jokes,  Jokes About Parents,  
    
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Other dads putting their kids to bed

My dad

You will go to sleep 

Or I will put you to sleep
Other dads putting their kids to bed

My dad

You will go to sleep

Or I will put you to sleep


Memes,  Clean Funny Jokes For Kids,  
    
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Daddy left & took the sticker with him
Daddy left & took the sticker with him

Memes,  Bumper Sticker Jokes,  Dead Beat Dad Jokes,  
    
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my birthday is 9 months after my dad's...... ...... i was birthday sex
my birthday is 9 months after my dad's...... ...... i was birthday sex

Funny Jokes,  Birthday Sms Jokes,  
    
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That awkward moment when you want to go bra shopping and your dad has to take you.
That awkward moment when you want to go bra shopping and your dad has to take you.


Relatable Posts,  Funny Girly Quotes,  Teen,  
    
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