Funny Parent Quotes

 – 108 total
You don't know fear until a toddler rears back their hand to throw a toy at your face from 3 inches away
You don't know fear until a toddler rears back their hand to throw a toy at your face from 3 inches away

Memes,  Bad Toddlers,  
    
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Joe Budden as a father: "I don't care if it's not fun! It's L, M, N, O, P... not ELIMINOPEE. Do your ABC's again."
Joe Budden as a father: "I don't care if it's not fun! It's L, M, N, O, P... not ELIMINOPEE. Do your ABC's again."

Memes,  Rapper Meme,  
    
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He looks like his father
He looks like his father

Memes,  New Baby Jokes,  Funny Pregnancy Images,  
    
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"Can I go out?"

My mom: I need names, numbers address, socials, license plates, you naaaaame it!
"Can I go out?"

My mom: I need names, numbers address, socials, license plates, you naaaaame it!


Memes,  Moms Be Like,  Shirley Caesar Meme,  
    
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Me: You think we'll have cute kids?

Wife: We have kids silly

Me: Sure but they're ugly
Me: You think we'll have cute kids?

Wife: We have kids silly

Me: Sure but they're ugly


Memes,  Cute Kid Jokes,  
    
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"when we get in the store don't touch  , don't ask for  cause you ain't getting "
"when we get in the store don't touch , don't ask for cause you ain't getting "

Memes,  Funny Mom Sayings,  Store Jokes,  
    
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me: mom i can't find it !

mom: if i come in there and find it, ima  yo !

me:
me: mom i can't find it !

mom: if i come in there and find it, ima yo !

me:


Memes,  Funny Mom Quotes,  Mr Krabs Meme,  
    
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dad: cut it up real small so u don't cke babe

mom: what are u gonna teach me w to swallow next?

dad: too late now...right kids?...lol
dad: cut it up real small so u don't cke babe

mom: what are u gonna teach me w to swallow next?

dad: too late now...right kids?...lol


Memes,  
    
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"If I win power ball I'm going to pay someone to clean my kids room and with the other $8 I'm going to buy chicken wings."
"If I win power ball I'm going to pay someone to clean my kids room and with the other $8 I'm going to buy chicken wings."

Tim Hawkins Jokes,  Lottery Jokes,  
    
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when my kids are teenagers i'ma be like

i didn't get no ing sleep cause of y'all, y'all not gonna get no sleep cause of me!
when my kids are teenagers i'ma be like

i didn't get no ing sleep cause of y'all, y'all not gonna get no sleep cause of me!


Memes,  Funny Witty Quotes,  
    
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Foreign parents will never be proud of you.

Dad: How old are you?

Me: 18

Dad: When I was your age I was 19
Foreign parents will never be proud of you.

Dad: How old are you?

Me: 18

Dad: When I was your age I was 19


Memes,  Foreigner Jokes,  Nick Young Memes,  
    
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oh yay it friday

oh wait a minute i have kids, friday doesn't mean
oh yay it friday

oh wait a minute i have kids, friday doesn't mean


Mary Poppins Jokes,  Jokes About Friday,  Friday Humor Jokes,  
    
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w much milk does your baby drink

idk a boobfull?
w much milk does your baby drink

idk a boobfull?


Memes,  Funny Mom Quotes,  Good Luck Charlie Meme,  
    
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when your parents say your friends are a bad influence
when your parents say your friends are a bad influence

Memes,  South Park Meme,  
    
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I feel sorry that you have to use common core to solve 2 x 2. When I was your age we did not have to be architects to solve math problems!!!
I feel sorry that you have to use common core to solve 2 x 2. When I was your age we did not have to be architects to solve math problems!!!

Common Core Math Meme,  Architecture Puns,  
    
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