Funny Quotes And Sayings

 – 69 total
I play with scissors for the shear fun of it.
I play with scissors for the shear fun of it.

Sewing Puns,  Best Short Joke,  
    
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Hipsters is what happens when you tell every child theyre special
Hipsters is what happens when you tell every child theyre special

Funny Quotes,  Hipster Jokes,  Best Hipster Jokes,  
    
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it ain't trickin' if you got it.

-a trick
it ain't trickin' if you got it.

-a trick


Funny Quotes,  Funny Ghetto Sayings,  Ghetto Sayings,  
    
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At least my room is a bigger mess than me
At least my room is a bigger mess than me

Funny Life Quotes,  Life Humor,  Funny Life Jokes,  
    
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i consider my day successful if no one gets shanked.
i consider my day successful if no one gets shanked.

Funny Jokes,  Very Funny Sayings,  
    
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Can I try a 30 day free trial of being famous
Can I try a 30 day free trial of being famous

Funny Jokes,  Funny One Liners On Life,  Funny Short Jokes,  
    
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Saying 'let me speak to your manager' is just the adult version of 'I'm telling on you'
Saying 'let me speak to your manager' is just the adult version of 'I'm telling on you'

Funny Jokes,  Adult Jokes,  Snitch Jokes,  
    
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I'm not anti-social

I'm anti-idiot
I'm not anti-social

I'm anti-idiot


Memes,  Idiot Jokes,  Anti Social Jokes,  
    
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Doing nothing is an activity and anyone who says otherwise doesn't belong in your life
Doing nothing is an activity and anyone who says otherwise doesn't belong in your life

Funny Jokes,  Lazy Jokes,  Lazy People Quotes,  
    
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Can I sleep for 6 years and wake up with a degree and a mansion????
Can I sleep for 6 years and wake up with a degree and a mansion????

Funny Jokes,  Sleep Humor,  
    
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If you can't handle me at my diddliest

You don't deserve me at my doodliest
If you can't handle me at my diddliest

You don't deserve me at my doodliest


Memes,  Funny Simpsons Quotes,  
    
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I hope daylight savings hasn't thrown off your schedule of doing nothing.
I hope daylight savings hasn't thrown off your schedule of doing nothing.

Funny Ecards,  Wasting Time Jokes,  
    
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KAPPITS (1)
bitch: fu
15 awesome Catchphrases To Use In Everyday Life
for best results, read these in your manliest, most gravelly voice (then dramatically put on and/or take off your shades).

Life,  Funny Cool Sayings,  Life,  Funny And Relatable,  
    
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I'll never eat again, I'm so fat
I'll never eat again, I'm so fat

Relatable Posts,  Women Memes,  Overweight Jokes,  
    
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if you touch my virginity 

i'll stab you
if you touch my virginity

i'll stab you


Meme,  Virginity Jokes,  Funny Nerd Quotes,  
    
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