Funny Quotes Sayings

 – 65 total
All I want to do is sleep, drink coffee & ride my bike.
All I want to do is sleep, drink coffee & ride my bike.

Sleep Jokes,  Coffee Jokes,  Biker Jokes One Liners,  
    
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The money is no better in retirement, but the hours are.
The money is no better in retirement, but the hours are.

Money Jokes,  Funny Retirement Wishes,  Funny Retirement Sayings,  
    
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kidney stone

you mean  trophy?
kidney stone

you mean trophy?


Kidney Jokes,  Overly Manly Man Meme (theme),  Pee Jokes,  
    
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don't get it twisted... a lot of you  are "basic es" too
don't get it twisted... a lot of you are "basic es" too

Funny Black People,  
    
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don't ask me for relationship advice because i'll always tell you to dump them and throw their  in the dumpster.
don't ask me for relationship advice because i'll always tell you to dump them and throw their in the dumpster.

Funny Jokes,  Funny Relationship Sayings,  Funny Relationship Advice,  
    
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before you criticize somebody else try to keep in mind that you are probably a piece of
before you criticize somebody else try to keep in mind that you are probably a piece of

Funny Quotes,  Funny Quotes On Attitude,  Random Funny Sayings,  
    
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I don't even believe myself when I say I'll be ready in 5 minutes.
I don't even believe myself when I say I'll be ready in 5 minutes.

Funny Jokes,  Dress-up Jokes,  
    
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when ya  go out and post tons of pictures but none with her es, she's with a !

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when ya go out and post tons of pictures but none with her es, she's with a !

#thankmelater


Funny Quotes,  Funny Love Advice,  
    
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It's funny when you tell someone that you don't like people,

They always think you mean other people.
It's funny when you tell someone that you don't like people,

They always think you mean other people.


Memes,  Jokes About People,  Mean Humor,  
    
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I don't know how to tell my friend that I'm imaginary.
I don't know how to tell my friend that I'm imaginary.

Funny Jokes,  Imagination Jokes,  Friend Jokes,  
    
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I don't care what my child grows up to be, as long as it's not a person who comments on Youtube videos.
I don't care what my child grows up to be, as long as it's not a person who comments on Youtube videos.

Funny Quotes,  Youtube Jokes,  
    
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I'm pretty sure that if you're not famous then they're not called "haters", they're called "people who just actually hate you"
I'm pretty sure that if you're not famous then they're not called "haters", they're called "people who just actually hate you"

Funny Quotes,  Funny Hater Quotes,  Hate Jokes,  
    
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Just did a tupperware inventory. 17 round containers. 2 square lids.
Just did a tupperware inventory. 17 round containers. 2 square lids.

Funny Kitchen Quotes,  Tupperware Jokes  
    
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The nice part about living in a small town is that if you don't know what you are doing, someone else does.
KAPPITS (1)
dagi: nice
The nice part about living in a small town is that if you don't know what you are doing, someone else does.

Funny Quotes,  Neighbor Humor,  
    
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If this weekend goes as planned, it will not include any actual plans.
If this weekend goes as planned, it will not include any actual plans.

Funny Quotes,  Funny Weekend Quotes,  Weekend Jokes,  
    
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