Funny Tweets

 – 259 total
People that start a sentence with "Now I'm not trying to be rude" are either about to be rude, or about to sing Ignition by R Kelly.
People that start a sentence with "Now I'm not trying to be rude" are either about to be rude, or about to sing Ignition by R Kelly.

Memes,  R Kelly Meme,  Funny Rude Facts,  
    
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Day 126 with no sex. I've lost hearing in my right eye
Day 126 with no sex. I've lost hearing in my right eye

Memes,  Loser Jokes,  
    
100%

"Bet you won't" gets me in a lottttta trouble
"Bet you won't" gets me in a lottttta trouble

Memes,  Relatable Funny Quotes,  Funny Daily Sayings,  
    
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Accidentally said Happy Mothers's Day to my mom in person instead of writing a paragraph on social media.
Accidentally said Happy Mothers's Day to my mom in person instead of writing a paragraph on social media.

Memes,  Mothers Day Jokes,  Mothers Day Funny Sayings,  
    
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I hate when I take 2829 selfies not one of em is cute. But I look in the mirror and I'm cute. Don't get it
I hate when I take 2829 selfies not one of em is cute. But I look in the mirror and I'm cute. Don't get it

Memes,  Selfie Jokes,  
    
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Wtf only half my squad showed up to me bday party smh #fakefriends Ohhhhh yeaaaaaaah lmao I forgot
Wtf only half my squad showed up to me bday party smh #fakefriends

Ohhhhh yeaaaaaaah lmao I forgot

Memes,  Movie Humor,  The Avengers Jokes,  
    
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Stalking my social media won't tell you anything. I could post "I'm so done" and be talking about how they gave me one less nugget at Wendy's
Stalking my social media won't tell you anything. I could post "I'm so done" and be talking about how they gave me one less nugget at Wendy's

Memes,  Fast Food Jokes,  
    
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why the would u wanna go big when u can go me
why the would u wanna go big when u can go me

Memes,  Lazy People Quotes,  Funny Questions Without Answers,  
    
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idk w y'all girls be out here deep throating s cause i got swabbed for strep and almost ped out and died
idk w y'all girls be out here deep throating s cause i got swabbed for strep and almost ped out and died

Memes,  
    
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For lent I'm just giving up
For lent I'm just giving up

Memes,  Lent Memes,  Funny Catholic Jokes,  
    
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Y'all pronounce it data or data? I'm mad that I read these in two different ways...but you're trippin if you think it's data and not data
Y'all pronounce it data or data?

I'm mad that I read these in two different ways...but you're trippin if you think it's data and not data

Memes,  Grammar Jokes,  Language Jokes,  
    
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just heard this on the pne say he not arguing with no one w refrigerator doesn't make ice. that's actually my mood from now on
just heard this on the pne say he not arguing with no one w refrigerator doesn't make ice. that's actually my mood from now on

Memes,  Refrigerator Jokes,  Funny Arguing Quotes,  
    
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Just imagine there is someone out there who sleeps in their socks, eats pineapple on pizza and sleeps with their bedroom door wide open
Just imagine there is someone out there who sleeps in their socks, eats pineapple on pizza and sleeps with their bedroom door wide open

Memes,  Daily Life Jokes,  
    
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The worst part about parallel parking is the witnesses
The worst part about parallel parking is the witnesses

Memes,  Parking Jokes,  Funny Car Quotes,  
    
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I need to start wearing a GoPro on nights out so I can pinpoint where exactly it all goes wrong
I need to start wearing a GoPro on nights out so I can pinpoint where exactly it all goes wrong

Memes,  Camera Jokes,  
    
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