Funny Uber Stories

 – 17 total
My Uber driver brought her kid Im laughing so hard I had to apologize Definitely not okay! Please get in touch by replying to your emailed trip receipt so we can follow up with you about that. I ain't no snitch
My Uber driver brought her kid Im laughing so hard I had to apologize

Definitely not okay! Please get in touch by replying to your emailed trip receipt so we can follow up with you about that.

I ain't no snitch

Memes,  Snitch Jokes,  Funniest Tweets Ever,  
    
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Got in my uber on halloween and the driver was wearing a fullout costume from game of thrones and pointed his sword in the direction we were going at every turn lol
Got in my uber on halloween and the driver was wearing a fullout costume from game of thrones and pointed his sword in the direction we were going at every turn lol

Driver Jokes,  Uber Meme,  
    
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My Uber driver from earlier just texted me Hey Julie, this is your uber driver from tonight, Jeffrey! I just realized I forgot to give you a promo code. Use the code 'cutie' for a free ride, but only valid if you use it on the way to dinner with me.
My Uber driver from earlier just texted me

Hey Julie, this is your uber driver from tonight, Jeffrey! I just realized I forgot to give you a promo code. Use the code 'cutie' for a free ride, but only valid if you use it on the way to dinner with me.

Taxi And Cab Driver Jokes,  Creepy,  
    
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One time I was getting into the uber because me and my friend were going to a party, and my friends dress was black and white vertically striped and she got in and he says "damn she look like a whoreo"
One time I was getting into the uber because me and my friend were going to a party, and my friends dress was black and white vertically striped and she got in and he says "damn she look like a whoreo"

Cookie Puns,  Oreo Cookie Jokes,  
    
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My uber dropped me off a work and told me to text him and he would come give me a free ride home and now I regret it Bc he won't leave me alone and he knows where I live But hey, he drives an Infiniti G37
My uber dropped me off a work and told me to text him and he would come give me a free ride home and now I regret it Bc he won't leave me alone and he knows where I live

But hey, he drives an Infiniti G37

Stalker Jokes,  Creepy,  
    
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I caught an uber to the airpot 2 weeks ago and on the way there we got stuck in major traffic and ended up missing my flight, Next flight available was 9 hours later so the uber invited me back to his house and we chilled and played Mortal Kombat
I caught an uber to the airpot 2 weeks ago and on the way there we got stuck in major traffic and ended up missing my flight, Next flight available was 9 hours later so the uber invited me back to his house and we chilled and played Mortal Kombat

Airport Jokes,  Traveling Jokes,  
    
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Smelled like Totino's pizza rolls which yeah I know sounds nice but tottally was not
Smelled like Totino's pizza rolls which yeah I know sounds nice but tottally was not

Uber Jokes,  Smell Jokes,  
    
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Friend and I ordered an Uber to pick us up while partying Anaheim, the uber driver gets there, picks us us and starts pulling out into the street. She didn't see the old fat man in a motorized wheelchair driving across the sidewalk I guess because sh managed to hit him pulling out of the parking lot. h was ok, but she was hyperventilating.
Friend and I ordered an Uber to pick us up while partying Anaheim, the uber driver gets there, picks us us and starts pulling out into the street. She didn't see the old fat man in a motorized wheelchair driving across the sidewalk I guess because sh managed to hit him pulling out of the parking lot. h was ok, but she was hyperventilating.

Car Accident Jokes,  Uber Stories,  
    
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i took an uber to a party like 5 days ago and he looked like he was 20 r around there so i knew he would wanna party so i asked him and he ended up buying alcol for us and partied all night with us and even gave us a ride me drunk as .instant 5 stars.
i took an uber to a party like 5 days ago and he looked like he was 20 r around there so i knew he would wanna party so i asked him and he ended up buying alcol for us and partied all night with us and even gave us a ride me drunk as .instant 5 stars.

Drunk Driving Jokes,  Great Story Jokes,  
    
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last week i was mad af in an uber cause i lost a basketball game, the uber driver sensed it so he asked what was wrong, after i told him he told me "stop being a lil case if you aint going to be no kobe or lebbron. you better get used to losing!"
last week i was mad af in an uber cause i lost a basketball game, the uber driver sensed it so he asked what was wrong, after i told him he told me "stop being a lil case if you aint going to be no kobe or lebbron. you better get used to losing!"

Basketball Joke,  Funny Loser Jokes,  
    
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a couple guy friends and i ordered an uber me from the club the other week quite drunk. we convinced our female driver to take of anything she was wearing every time we hit a red light. of course she took off s and stuff first but ran out of things and eventually was topless, i was so sad when we finally got me but such a fun ride
a couple guy friends and i ordered an uber me from the club the other week quite drunk. we convinced our female driver to take of anything she was wearing every time we hit a red light. of course she took off s and stuff first but ran out of things and eventually was topless, i was so sad when we finally got me but such a fun ride

Uber Jokes,  
    
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So I've always used the same Uber driver. I liked his car and he was a nice guy. Anyways, he just randomly dropped off the map and wouldn't reply to texts and did't show up on the Uber app. He texted me last week and said "Sorry Haleigh I've been in jail, hit me up if you need a ride soon!" ....... Don't know if I'm gonna call him again.
So I've always used the same Uber driver. I liked his car and he was a nice guy. Anyways, he just randomly dropped off the map and wouldn't reply to texts and did't show up on the Uber app. He texted me last week and said "Sorry Haleigh I've been in jail, hit me up if you need a ride soon!" ....... Don't know if I'm gonna call him again.

Uber Stories,  Good Story Jokes,  
    
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I was smashed at a party and I called up an Uber, At the time I didn't realize it was my current high school history teacer he now jokes about it in front of my class.
I was smashed at a party and I called up an Uber, At the time I didn't realize it was my current high school history teacer he now jokes about it in front of my class.

Teacher Student Jokes,  Drunk Humor,  
    
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i was on my way to soccer practice, and the uber driver and i started talking music, after naming a couple of artist i listen to he says "telling from w you listen to, i guess you smoke ?" he was right, and let's just say my daily uber driver is my plug lmao.
i was on my way to soccer practice, and the uber driver and i started talking music, after naming a couple of artist i listen to he says "telling from w you listen to, i guess you smoke ?" he was right, and let's just say my daily uber driver is my plug lmao.

Music Humor,  
    
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i took an uber two weeks ago and he kept trying to get me to goto his bible study it was pretty weird plus i'm an atheist, but i got really high and was hungry asf at that point all i remembered was him saying he gets pizza too so i called him, went and pretended to be gods child almost 2 urs for 3 slices of pizza
i took an uber two weeks ago and he kept trying to get me to goto his bible study it was pretty weird plus i'm an atheist, but i got really high and was hungry asf at that point all i remembered was him saying he gets pizza too so i called him, went and pretended to be gods child almost 2 urs for 3 slices of pizza

Atheist Jokes,  Pizza Jokes,  
    
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