i took an uber to a party like 5 days ago and he looked like he was 20 r around there so i knew he would wanna party so i asked him and he ended up buying alcol for us and partied all night with us and even gave us a ride me drunk as .instant 5 stars.
a usewife selected three small tomatoes and was told by the grocer they were 75 cents, "what!" she exclaimed, "75 cents for tse small, tomatoes? well you can just take them and you know what you can do with them!" "i can't lady," replied the unhappy grocer, "there's a 95 cent cuber there."
Fred and his wife Edna went to the state fair every year.
Every year Fred would say, Edna, Id like to ride in that there airplane. And every year Edna would say, I know Fred, but that airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars.
One year Fred and Edna went to the fair and Fred said, Edna, Im 71 years old. If I dont ride that airplane this year I may never get another chance. Edna replied, Fred that there airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars.
The pilot overheard them and said, Folks, Ill make you a deal. Ill take you both up for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say one word, I wont charge you, but if you say one word its ten dollars.
Fred and Edna agreed and up they go. The pilot does all kinds of twists and turns, rolls and dives, but not a word is heard. He does all his tricks over again, but still not a word.
They land and the pilot turns to Fred, By golly, I did everything I could think of to get you to yell out, but you didnt.
Fred replied, Well, I was going to say something when Edna fell out of the plane, but ten dollars is ten dollars.
As two BYU grads walked through the countryside, they noticed some tracks. The first asked, "Deer tracks?'' The second replied, "No, bear tracks.'' However, the conversation ended abruptly when a train hit them.