Jokes About Old People

 – 48 total
Why do older adults use ".." in the weirdest places...

Me: Ok cool! Looking forward to it.

Them: Sounds good...

Does it not sound good? I'm so confused.
Why do older adults use ".." in the weirdest places...

Me: Ok cool! Looking forward to it.

Them: Sounds good...

Does it not sound good? I'm so confused.


Memes,  Grammar Fail,  Confused Jokes,  
    
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Almost feel bad for Zuckerberg. There's no way he left that room full of old people without having to set up their wifi
KAPPITS (1)
BITCH: Im not stupid I see
Almost feel bad for Zuckerberg. There's no way he left that room full of old people without having to set up their wifi

Memes,  Wifi Jokes,  Congress Jokes,  
    
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When you ask a 1st grade class to write letters to people in a nursing home...
When you ask a 1st grade class to write letters to people in a nursing home...

Memes,  Nursing Home Jokes,  
    
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Your dog snores loudly

Nah - that's granny - they closed her home...
Your dog snores loudly

Nah - that's granny - they closed her home...


Old Granny Jokes,  Grandma Jokes,  
    
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Buys milks

Spills it on purpose
Buys milks

Spills it on purpose


Milk Jokes,  Old Granny Jokes,  Clean Old People Jokes,  
    
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gertrude was too old for a surprise party
gertrude was too old for a surprise party

Surprise Party Jokes,  Funny Old Age Jokes,  
    
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When I am 100 years old, I think I will look like this!
KAPPITS (2)
Archie: Hundred
Archie: 100
When I am 100 years old, I think I will look like this!

Memes,  Lmao Jokes,  
    
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He thinks it's the weather channel.
He thinks it's the weather channel.

Old Person Jokes,  Elderly Jokes,  
    
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Happy birthday to someone who now stands out as the weird, old person at summer music festivals.
Happy birthday to someone who now stands out as the weird, old person at summer music festivals.

Free Funny Birthday Ecards,  Old Person Joke,  
    
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"Sand Traps"

A woman turned 80 years old. She was an avid golfer, so she decided to move to Florida and join a country club.

On her first day at her new club, she was told that there wasn't anybody else available for a game just then.

Seeing her disappointment, and wanting to make her feel welcome, the female assistant pro offered to play with her, and asked her how many strokes she wanted for a bet. 

The older woman said, "I don't think I need any strokes, I've been playing great lately. I just have a heck of a time getting out of sand traps."

True to her word, the 80 year old played beautifully. When they came to the par four 18th, she and the pro were all even.

The pro hit a gorgeous tee shot, knocked her next one on the green, and two-putted for par. The older lady hit a great drive, but her second shot landed in a steep-sided bunker next to the green.

Playing from the sand, she lofted a high, soft shot. It came down a few feet from the cup and rolled in for a birdie, winning her the match and all the money.

The 80 year old was still standing in the trap when the pro walked over and said, "Beautiful shot! I thought you said you had a problem getting out of traps?"

"I really do, the 80 year old replied. Would you mind giving me a hand?"
"Sand Traps"

A woman turned 80 years old. She was an avid golfer, so she decided to move to Florida and join a country club.

On her first day at her new club, she was told that there wasn't anybody else available for a game just then.

Seeing her disappointment, and wanting to make her feel welcome, the female assistant pro offered to play with her, and asked her how many strokes she wanted for a bet.

The older woman said, "I don't think I need any strokes, I've been playing great lately. I just have a heck of a time getting out of sand traps."

True to her word, the 80 year old played beautifully. When they came to the par four 18th, she and the pro were all even.

The pro hit a gorgeous tee shot, knocked her next one on the green, and two-putted for par. The older lady hit a great drive, but her second shot landed in a steep-sided bunker next to the green.

Playing from the sand, she lofted a high, soft shot. It came down a few feet from the cup and rolled in for a birdie, winning her the match and all the money.

The 80 year old was still standing in the trap when the pro walked over and said, "Beautiful shot! I thought you said you had a problem getting out of traps?"

"I really do, the 80 year old replied. Would you mind giving me a hand?"


80 Year Old Birthday Jokes,  Best Golf Jokes,  
    
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When you're 60 you start bragging about your age. How else are you going to get your senior discounts?.
When you're 60 you start bragging about your age. How else are you going to get your senior discounts?.

Turning 60 Years Old Jokes,  Senior Citizen Jokes,  Old Person Birthday Jokes,  
    
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Getting older is like visiting an all-you-can-eat buffet. What should be hot is cold, what should be firm is limp, and the buns are bigger than anything else on the menu.
Getting older is like visiting an all-you-can-eat buffet. What should be hot is cold, what should be firm is limp, and the buns are bigger than anything else on the menu.

Older Women Jokes,  Getting Old Jokes One Liners,  
    
100%

of course i'm in a good mood!!! 

linda poured some geritol in my margarita!
of course i'm in a good mood!!!

linda poured some geritol in my margarita!


Grumpy Old Man Jokes,  Alcohol Jokes,  
    
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Morgan Freeman has always been old... bet this is his baby pic
Morgan Freeman has always been old... bet this is his baby pic

Memes,  Morgan Freeman Jokes,  
    
100%

Elderly patients

Day shift

Night shift
Elderly patients

Day shift

Night shift


Memes,  Patient Jokes,  Elderly Jokes,  
    
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