Jury Duty Jokes

 – 13 total
First President's Day work holiday in years

Jury Duty
First President's Day work holiday in years

Jury Duty


Memes,  Presidents Day Meme,  Best Bad Luck Brian Memes,  
    
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We can save time here. I already know if he's been bad or good.
We can save time here. I already know if he's been bad or good.

Funny Jokes,  Santa Humor,  
    
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she really doesn't want to get picked for jury duty
she really doesn't want to get picked for jury duty

Meme,  Black Funny Jokes Short,  
    
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I implore the jury to remember these words... 

If it fits, you must sits
I implore the jury to remember these words...

If it fits, you must sits


Memes,  Lawyer Cat (theme),  Funny Meme Pictures  
    
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This is the one day of the year I wish I was on Jury duty.
This is the one day of the year I wish I was on Jury duty.

April Fools Ecards,  Cute Silly Jokes  
    
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Judge: Is there any reason you could not serve as a juror in this case?

Juror: I dont want to be away from my job that long.

Judge: Cant they do without you at work?

Juror: Yes, but I dont want them to know it.


Judge Jokes,  Work Humor  
    
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Jury: Twelve men and women trying to decide which party has the best lawyer.

Justice: A decision in your favor.


Lawyer Jokes One Liners,  Law Jokes  
    
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Q: Why did the judge dismiss the entire jury made up of black cats?

A: Because each of them was guilty of purrjury!


Judge Jokes,  Black Cat Jokes  
    
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I find talking my way out of cleaning the dinner dishes just as satisfying as getting out of jury duty.

Marriage Humor,  Lazy Husband Jokes  
    
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During the trial of Peter Sutcliffe, the Yorkshire Ripper, the judge asked him to stand up while he read the verdict of the jury.

"You have been found guilty of murdering a woman with a hammer." the judge said sternly."You lying fucking bastard!" screamed a man from the gallery.

The judge stared at the man in astonishment, before turning back to the mass murderer to continue his verdict."You have also been found guilty of killing many more women with a stanley knife." said the judge."You miserable fucking shit!" screamed the man from the gallery."Sir," the judge said, "I am seconds away from charging you with bringing the court into disrepute.

Can you kindly explain your outrageous interruptions?"

"Well," shouted the man, "I lived next door to that fucking cunt Sutcliffe for 20 years, and when did he ever have a tool when I needed one?"


Judge Jokes,  Funny Story Jokes  
    
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The judge in a criminal case in Dublin was shocked when the accused pleaded guilty to the charge but was acquitted by the jury.

"How did you arrive at that verdict?" the judge asked the foreman of the jury.

"Well, your honour," said the foreman, "Everybody except you knows him to be the biggest liar in Ireland!"


Criminal Jokes,  Judge Jokes,  
    
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I have been trying to get on jury duty every year since I was 18 years old.

To get to go sit in an air conditioned room, downtown, judging people, while my lunch is paid for... that is the life.
I have been trying to get on jury duty every year since I was 18 years old.

To get to go sit in an air conditioned room, downtown, judging people, while my lunch is paid for... that is the life.



Courtroom Jokes,  Life Jokes  
    
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Q: Whats the one thing that never works when its fixed?

A: A jury.


Court Jokes,  Court Room Jokes  
    
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