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Lawyer Humor
– 59 total
Lawyer Humor
– 59 total
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lawyer: why did u kill this man?
me: i held the door for him and he didn't say thank you
lawyer: oh yeah that
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Guy: She liked another man's meme
Lawyer: ...So?
Guy: And commented " "
Lawyer: Wow, I'll get the divorce papers
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Calling a lawyer near you...
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Lawyer talking under his breath:
"Guiltypeople say what?"
Defendant: what?
Lawyer: no further questions your honor
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''I'm in favor of same-sex marriage. Same-sex marriage will lead to same-sex divorce.''
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"And remember, people, there are no frivolous lawsuits... Only frivolous attorneys!"
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'I always thought that was just a figure of speech.'
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'since you were born with wings, we'll argue that flying witut a license does not apply in your case...and if you'll sw up in court fully clothed, i think i can get the public nudity charge thrown out.'
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Back in my day
We didn't have lawyers, we took responsibility for our own stupidity!
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A bad lawyer can drag a case out for several years. A good lawyer can make it last even longer.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?
[Hide answer]
The caterer.
[Show answer]
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Lawyers...
You either die a hero or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.
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A good lawyer never makes mistrakes.
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One does not simply
Pass the bar exam on the first try
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If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.
Unless you a lawyer, in which case you should go to the courthouse and get an order requiring the building of said door.
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