Turtle Jokes

 – 65 total
Here you will find the funniest turtle jokes. We’ve taken anything funny or viral we could find, including what you’ve sent us, and added it here.

Turtles are slow and come in different sizes ranging from tiny to huge and are predominantly all shell. Like with any animal there are a lot of turtle jokes, but when you factor in the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles the jokes double.

Leonardo, Michelangelo, Raphael and Donatello are teenagers and ninjas in addition to being turtles that opens the door for all kinds of jokes.

We have the best collection of turtle jokes on the Internet. We are always adding new content to this section so be sure to check back often. While you are here, be sure to rate your favorites and share with your friends!
Celibacy sounded like such a good idea

And then he wore his glasses...
Celibacy sounded like such a good idea

And then he wore his glasses...


Celibacy Jokes,  Glasses Jokes,  
    
100%

Sponsored Ad
Snails

Are just turtle slugs
Snails

Are just turtle slugs


Snail Jokes,  Slug Jokes,  
    
0%

''Okay, smart guy, how fast do you say you were going?"
''Okay, smart guy, how fast do you say you were going?"

Police Jokes One Liners,  Speeding Ticket Jokes,  
    
0%

Speed Dating: Hurry up, you old git!
Speed Dating: Hurry up, you old git!

Funny Turtle Jokes,  Speed Dating Jokes,  
    
0%

Speed Dating for Turtles

I -

Ring!
Speed Dating for Turtles

I -

Ring!


Funny Turtle Jokes,  Turtle Humor,  
    
0%

you  1 turtle and they build a statue about you.
you 1 turtle and they build a statue about you.

Statue Jokes,  Turtle Humor,  
    
0%

when she tells you to hit it from the back real slow
when she tells you to hit it from the back real slow

Memes,  Turtle Humor,  
    
100%

Sponsored Ad
These turtles have a nicer apartment than I do...
These turtles have a nicer apartment than I do...

Memes,  Funny Turtle Jokes,  Turtle Humor,  
    
0%

Get me some turtle soup

And make it snappy!
Get me some turtle soup

And make it snappy!


Memes,  Soup Jokes,  
    
0%

Who's tired of school?
Who's tired of school?

Memes,  School Humor,  
    
0%

Check out my slow cooker :)
Check out my slow cooker :)

Funny Pictures,  Chef Jokes,  Cooking Jokes,  
    
0%

he's waving his  near a snapping turtle

that's a bold move, cotton. let's see if it pays off for him
he's waving his near a snapping turtle

that's a bold move, cotton. let's see if it pays off for him


Memes,  
    
0%

let's see w gets me first!

ok!
let's see w gets me first!

ok!


Memes,  Turtle Humor,  
    
0%

Oh heeey, darling
Oh heeey, darling

Memes,  Funny Gay Quotes,  
    
100%




page
1
Hashtag your funny pics with #kappit to be featured!