Turtle Puns

 – 34 total
                 
Here you will find the funniest turtle puns. We’ve taken anything funny or viral we could find, including what you’ve sent us, and added it here.

Turtles are slow and in direct contrast to ninjas. So that would make the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles a complete contradiction. The new theme song for TMNT is full of face palm worthy turtle puns, "You know I got your back / Just like a turtle shell / Nobody do it better / All my brothers trying to get some cheddar / We all want our cut like the Shredder."

We have the best collection of turtle puns on the Internet. We are always adding new content to this section so be sure to check back often. While you are here, be sure to rate your favorites and share with your friends!
We got a new slow cooker
We got a new slow cooker

Cooking Jokes,  Cooking Meme,  Chef Jokes,  
    
100%

Sponsored Ad
I never thought I'd say this, but you're moving just a little too fast for me.
I never thought I'd say this, but you're moving just a little too fast for me.

Make Out Jokes,  Funny Rabbit Jokes,  Rabbit Jokes,  
    
-100%

b*tch!

you tught i was slow,  huh?
b*tch!

you tught i was slow, huh?


Memes,  Turtle Humor,  
    
0%

so i saw this knife wielding, barrel hauling, kilt wearing bad  at the renaissance festival.
so i saw this knife wielding, barrel hauling, kilt wearing bad at the renaissance festival.

Funny Pictures,  Funny Turtle Jokes,  
    
0%

i tasted blood! 

you hear me human! you're next!
i tasted blood!

you hear me human! you're next!


Funny Pictures,  Funny Human Images,  
    
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"Your mother is 

A big turtle"
"Your mother is

A big turtle"


Memes,  Your Mother Jokes,  Your Mamma Jokes  
    
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Sponsored Ad
He's slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.

Good Roast Jokes,  Slow People Jokes  
    
-200%

you think your life is hard? just think,

there's a turtle out there that has been flipped on its back and can't get up.  your problems
you think your life is hard? just think,

there's a turtle out there that has been flipped on its back and can't get up. your problems


Funny Motivational Sayings,  Problem Jokes  
    
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screw you guys

i'm going me
screw you guys

i'm going me


Funny Turtle Jokes,  Turtle Humor  
    
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My pet turtle died. I'm not upset, just shell shocked.

Funny Turtle Jokes,  Turtle Humor  
    
100%

 put me down

before i turtle slap the  out of you
put me down

before i turtle slap the out of you


Funny Turtle Jokes,  Slap Jokes  
    
100%

Q. What did the snail say when he hitched a ride on the turtle?

A. Wheeeee!!!!!


Silly Animal Jokes,  Snail Jokes,  
    
100%

KAPPITS (1)
Even a turtle only makes progress when it sticks its neck out.

Turtle Humor,  Turtle Jokes,  Funny Advice Quotes  
    
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