Two Line Jokes

 – 42 total
Q: How many triage nurses does it take to change a light bulb?

A: One, but the bulb will have to spend four hours in the waiting room.

Funny Nursing Quotes,  Super Hilarious Jokes,  

I lost my job as a lion-tamer, they said I was taking too long.

My plan was, through a selective breeding program, to have them eating out of my hand in about 12 to 14 generations.

Fired Jokes,  Funny Work Jokes,  

How easy is it for wind gusts to talk to each other?

It is a breeze

Wind Puns,  Funny Jokes To Tell,  

Q: What are steroids?

A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

Steroid Funny,  Cleaning Jokes,  House Cleaning Puns  

What did the big candle say to the little candle?

I'm going out tonight!

Clean Question And Answer Jokes,  Q And A Jokes,  

Why is a burning candle like being thirsty?

Because a little water ends both of them!

Short Funny One Liner Jokes,  Hilarious Jokes For Kids,  

Q: Did you hear about the carrot detective?

A: He got to the root of every case

Carrot Jokes,  Detective Jokes,  Carrot Puns,  

Q: Why didn't the quarter roll down the hill with the nickel?

A: Because it had more cents.

Money Puns,  Money Humor  

Q: What do yuppie alligators like to drink

A: Jaw-va

Alligator Jokes,  Drinking Puns,  Alligator Puns  

Q: How did Mitt Romney make hundreds of millions of dollars?

A: By turning $21 an hour jobs into $9 an hour jobs

Money Jokes,  Saved Money Jokes,  

Q: What is Barack Obama's new slogan in these tough times?

A: Spare Change You Can Believe In!

Funny Obama Slogans,  Money Humor,  

Q. Whats white and cant climb trees?

A. A fridge.

Tree Jokes,  Refrigerator Jokes,  

How do you fix your dishwasher?

Kick her in the arse!

Dishwasher Jokes,  Female Jokes,  

How did Captain Hook Die?

Jock itch!

Captain Hook Jokes,  Death Puns,  

Did you hear about the Irish serial killer?

He slashed 25 boxes of corn flakes before he got caught!

Killer Jokes,  Cute Irish Jokes,  

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